My Grandma Is Cooler Than Your Grandma (Though I Might Be Biased)

I wouldn’t say my family is psychic, but we’re not exactly normal. Let’s just say we’re sensitive to certain things, and as a result, we’ve got a lot of creepy stories to tell. Maybe it’s because of our Scottish heritage, our ties to the old world. Or maybe we’re just tuned in.

The first thing you need to know about my grandma is she’s cool—I’d say cool for an elderly person, but she’s always been cool. Her signature color is red, and she can still rock a killer pair of boots, even in her eighties. She grew up in a poor family, but her father set aside money so she could take dance lessons. Vaudeville was giving way to cinema, and maybe he hoped she’d someday be a star. She didn’t hit the big time, but she retained a certain flair that set her apart from her peers.

She’s also the luckiest person I’ve ever met. If there’s a raffle to be entered, you can bet my grandma will enter and win. That’s not to say she hasn’t had her share of bad luck in life, or that she’s won the lottery, but she has an uncanny knack for winning drawings and finding help when she needs it. Hopefully that part of her Scottish DNA has been passed down to her grandchildren.

Blue MummyThe third thing you need to know is that my grandma loves scary stories. When I was a kid we’d eat junk food and watch B horror movies together. There was one about killer bees, and another about a mummy’s hand that skittered about on its own, an image which likely scarred me for life. She had a fear of being presumed dead and then buried alive, and I remember there was a movie about this too. It was terrifying and I loved it. That part of her DNA definitely got passed down.

My grandma used to tell stories about living in a haunted house when my dad was a young boy. She said she’d wake up at night to see a strange mist swirling overhead. The ghost, who she dubbed Ella, liked to repair things. Once my grandma found a button sewn on a dress, a button that she swore had fallen off, that she set aside to sew back on. Another time there was a horrible banging noise coming from the laundry room. My grandmother had guests over, and they asked what the noise was. My grandma brushed it off and said, “Oh, my washing machine is broken. That’s just Ella fixing it for us.” After that, the washing machine worked just fine.

© Melissa Eskue Ousley 2015

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8 responses

  1. Cathee

    Ah, so that’s where you get your flare for the scary and gruesome. Your grandma does sound cool with some intriguing stories. I wonder if she was ever visited by loved ones who passed before.

    August 1, 2015 at 7:30 am

  2. Haha–yes, that’s one place I get it. I don’t know if she’s ever seen relatives–I’ll have to ask. Do you have any scary stories to share?

    August 1, 2015 at 8:31 am

  3. Pefy

    Maybe Ella could come fix our ice maker? LOL

    August 1, 2015 at 9:50 am

  4. Anonymous

    Ella followed your great granddad Buchan before your grandmother. He had some wonderful stories to tell.

    August 1, 2015 at 10:45 am

  5. That would be handy having someone to fix appliances, Pefy. 😀

    I’m curious about these Buchan stories! Do you know any of them? If so, maybe I can include them in another post sometime. Will you email me the details? I would appreciate it. (solasbeir@gmail.com) Thanks!

    August 1, 2015 at 10:52 am

  6. Awesome first post Melissa! Looking forward to your scary stories and more about your grandma. She sounds a lot like mine 🙂

    August 1, 2015 at 11:30 am

  7. A feng shui poltergeist? I need one!

    August 1, 2015 at 12:25 pm

  8. Thanks DelSheree! Your grandma sounds pretty cool too. 😀

    Haha Justin! I would love one that found things around the house, since everyone is always asking me where things are (keys, glasses, video games, shoes…you get the idea).

    August 1, 2015 at 1:51 pm

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